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Babysitter!

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Babysitter!

Post by bethanyrose on Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:25 pm

I have a question as well but I will post that after my story. I don't want to post the name publicly but you can PM me if you want to know. Here goes!

My son is nearing 20 months. He's had some difficulties with talking so we are looking into Tyke Talk. We've had the referral, now just waiting on the callback. I am (or was anyways) working full-time hours. DF has been home with Josh while I was at work. He is now trying to get a job so we were looking for a babysitter. We found one that met all our requirements. She was incredible. When she came to meet with us, her and Josh clicked well. They got along great. References checked out as well. Josh was there for two days in total. The first one he was there for about 4 hours. The second for about 5. DF went to pick him up the second day to have the babysitter tell him that Josh had been crying nearly the entire time and cried himself to sleep. Why was he crying? Because she refused to give him anything and I mean anything until he said please and thank you. He doesn't talk. She knew this. He wasn't fed. He was sent with a sippy cup of milk and it was the same one he had when he came home that he was sent with. He was there for lunch and supper. (4:30-5 is supper for him) I was beyond livid. We fired her. You do not withhold food and drink from a child. That is abuse. We reported her to CAS as well because she has a kid too. If she is doing this to my child, is she doing it to hers?

We were going to be talking to her at that point already because we found out that she had 2 roommates in her apt. We had been told her and her daughter lived alone. That would have been fine if she had told us in the beginning but no, she lied. We also found out that the father has custody of her daughter. She gets visitations only. Another lie.

Now my question, do I still pay her for the hours she worked? I'd rather not because well, what did she do? Abused my child and I'm not going to condone her behaviour. However, I don't want to get in trouble either.
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by Muffin on Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:30 pm

Now don't quote me on this, but I think because she was hired under false pretenses and neglected and in a way endangered your child, I don't believe that you do have to pay her. Something to look into legally though.
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by Isis on Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:31 pm

Thats a tough one!
I would probably with hold payment because you hired her to care for your child and she didn't... I mean yea she watched him, but she didn't *care*. If he was crying the entire time, like.. why the heck didn't she just give him the food or drink?? I dunno... Personally. I wouldn't pay her.. or if I did, I would cut the pay significantly.
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by bethanyrose on Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:39 pm

See that's my thinking. She didn't care for him. Paying her would also mean going to see her, calling her to discuss the payment. I do not want to speak with her. Whatsoever. If I do, I wouldn't trust myself to not hurt her. lol I'm not a violent person but I had violent thoughts running through my head then.
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by Muffin on Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:40 pm

I'm a little surprised you haven't punched her already tongue
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by bethanyrose on Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:43 pm

Muffin wrote:I'm a little surprised you haven't punched her already tongue

If I wasn't a tiny girl like I am, I would have. lol And I'm not violent. I'd love to though!
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by Isis on Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:45 pm

I'm a violent person Wink I beat Muffin up with hammers Wink tongue LMAO








(For those of you thinking WHAT Shocked - they're foam...)
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by bethanyrose on Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:47 pm

Isis wrote:I'm a violent person Wink I beat Muffin up with hammers Wink tongue LMAO








(For those of you thinking WHAT Shocked - they're foam...)

Nice! I beat Franco too but with whatever object I can throw at him tongue
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by Isis on Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:50 pm

I support this abuse! tongue Wink

We've gone ADHD on a thread again... Laughing

Babysitting to beating our 'hubbys'.
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by bethanyrose on Fri Mar 09, 2012 11:59 am

I just got an email from her asking for her payment. She's like you two owe me $xx.xx I'm sorry things didn't work out.
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by Isis on Fri Mar 09, 2012 12:29 pm

I would write her back saying;

We hired you to care for our child. This includes feeding and ensuring he gets a drink when needed. You failed to do these to vital things on BOTH days you had him. Since you didn't hold up your end of the bargain, we won't be holding up ours. Oh and y'know.. tell her you're suing like yo Mama said Wink

And then just dont answer her emails at all again.
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by superdad on Fri Mar 09, 2012 8:15 pm

Legally if you hired her to do a job no matter how unimpressed you were you are are by law supposed to pay her but there are many grey areas in the law where you can refuse to pay her as she didn't preform the job she was hired to do and she lied about a lot of things and obtained the job through false pretenses. so i would ask for a receipt for the services and a detailed report of what she did to "care" for your child that day? if she doesnt want to do that or admits that she didnt really care for them in the report then tell them your refusing payment and if they decide to pursue payment through legal means then they will have to do that to obtain payment. 90% chance you wont have to ever talk to them because they dont know how or dont want to pay to try and get money, if they do you already have a written confession from them or if they wont give you one refusal to provide documentation of what they did with your child and proof of them even being there. ultimately you can get off of paying them one way or another if you dont want to for bad service.

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Re: Babysitter!

Post by Isis on Fri Mar 09, 2012 8:20 pm

@Superdad
So if the woman actually takes her to court, chances are Bethany will win the case?
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by Muffin on Fri Mar 09, 2012 8:25 pm

superdad wrote: so i would ask for a receipt for the services and a detailed report of what she did to "care" for your child that day? if she doesnt want to do that or admits that she didnt really care for them in the report then tell them your refusing payment and if they decide to pursue payment through legal means then they will have to do that to obtain payment.

Wouldn't she require a witness for the report? It does seem fairly easy to make up a big batch of bs to save her own ass.
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by Isis on Fri Mar 09, 2012 8:30 pm

I agree with Muffin... she could easily just make shit up.. especially at this point... she would need as much evidence to support her story as possible now... So what would stop her from lying about the events that took place those 2 days?
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by bethanyrose on Fri Mar 09, 2012 10:31 pm

superdad wrote:Legally if you hired her to do a job no matter how unimpressed you were you are are by law supposed to pay her but there are many grey areas in the law where you can refuse to pay her as she didn't preform the job she was hired to do and she lied about a lot of things and obtained the job through false pretenses. so i would ask for a receipt for the services and a detailed report of what she did to "care" for your child that day? if she doesnt want to do that or admits that she didnt really care for them in the report then tell them your refusing payment and if they decide to pursue payment through legal means then they will have to do that to obtain payment. 90% chance you wont have to ever talk to them because they dont know how or dont want to pay to try and get money, if they do you already have a written confession from them or if they wont give you one refusal to provide documentation of what they did with your child and proof of them even being there. ultimately you can get off of paying them one way or another if you dont want to for bad service.

The thing about this is we have no contract whatsoever. She is now denying the negligence and abuse. She is now saying she did care for him while he was here. She's making up all of this now because I did contact CAS about it. She doesn't want to get in trouble. Apparently she is on the brink of losing her daughter as it is, this will throw it over the edge.

She has told me that she is taking me to court over this. I say go for it. She'll spend more money to start the case than what we actually owe her.
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by Muffin on Fri Mar 09, 2012 11:01 pm

With her current history with CAS, I'm sure she doesn't have much of a case, and if she isn't as dumb as she sounds (gotta have a least a little faith in humanity here) then she realizes this and all she's going on about is empty threats.
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by superdad on Mon Mar 12, 2012 12:13 am

she can state whatever she likes in the note you have evidence ie. the milk was sent home you sent, which gives you proof that shes lying. ultimately its up to the judge though if it did ever even get to court. In law enforcement they train you its not what happened that matters in court its how the judge views it. my advice would be to ask for the report and an invoice for what services are mentioned in the report and go from there. If you do decide to refuse to pay and it does come down to court which it probably wont because its going to cost them more money to file for the court date then what is owed then ask a lawyer for free advice on what you should do and you have a solid case as she lied and obtained care of your child for the time they were there through false pretenses.

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Re: Babysitter!

Post by Toadie24 on Thu May 17, 2012 12:28 pm

I can not WAIT to befinished my ECE program to start an at home Childcare ! hearing this makes me sick to my stomach. YES the child is subposed to say pleasse and thank you but if he cant talk Crying or Very sad then you obv cant force him to do it. I wish i had my full ECE i could help you
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by rlmr90 on Tue Jan 22, 2013 6:12 pm

Okay so I know this was posted a long time ago... but here is the way it should work legally... If there was no contract signed she is not legally bound to pay her... If you feel the Child was not cared for properly you should report it to CAS as odds are he isnt the only child that she is treating that way... The only way she could ever take you to court is if she had a contract or if she had a written proof that the child was with her for more than just a visit... I know this as I run a home daycare and had people not want to pay me... Not for neglect but because some ppl just dont see a reason to play there providers. Hope this never happens to your son again!
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by Isis on Tue Jan 22, 2013 8:58 pm

rlmr90 wrote:Okay so I know this was posted a long time ago... but here is the way it should work legally... If there was no contract signed she is not legally bound to pay her... If you feel the Child was not cared for properly you should report it to CAS as odds are he isnt the only child that she is treating that way... The only way she could ever take you to court is if she had a contract or if she had a written proof that the child was with her for more than just a visit... I know this as I run a home daycare and had people not want to pay me... Not for neglect but because some ppl just dont see a reason to play there providers. Hope this never happens to your son again!

I find that really odd because if you're running a certified daycare it would be not only expected by your clients that you're to be paid, but would also be laid out during registration exactly what payment would be, when it would be required and there would be a signed contract and agreement... It's my understanding that the majority of people know they have to pay their daycare providers.
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Re: Babysitter!

Post by rlmr90 on Tue Jan 22, 2013 11:33 pm

Yes but sometimes some daycare providers just have an interview and have no writen agreement out with ppl and than get the crap end of the deal I guess you can say... cause you know not everyone is honest... I have lived and learned.. For someone to be in my daycare they have to fill out a hole sheet of information as well as how much is to be payed and when it is to be payed by... You are right Majority of ppl know that they have to pay there daycare... but some just dont
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